Sorry about this….but I have to tell you that until a few days ago I was pretty depressed…and I’ve never knowingly been depressed before….it’s a constantly present fug of hopelessness that pervades everything. Not even my busted achilles left me feeling like this.
I actually managed to speak to my local MP…she had voted IN…she mentioned that all the EU countries have people who want out…and Brexit may result in reform in the EU..but too late for us. Some say that the Brits have always led the way – first to get rid of/dis-empower our kings; first to industrialise, home of democracy….
I went for a walk and found myself at Sainsbury’s where I found 2 old guys standing outside shaking their heads and saying ‘what a mess’ …surprisingly they had voted IN…almost without exception everyone I spoke to over 65 voted OUT. We consoled each other for 5 minutes or so…realising that there was no other way to go but onwards and upwards.
I decided to sleep in our upstairs spare room that night…it is a spacious but comforting and cosy loft room with sloping ceiling and a smallish dormer window. I didn’t actually sleep all that well (as I expected to)…but somehow I felt very much better the next morning…I did some gratitude journalling (see Good Stuff page) and then decided that there was something decidedly wrong with my own bedroom. I looked around at the attic room….lower ceiling, less clutter and no mirrors facing the bed….I wondered what feng shui had to say about this and lo and behold, mirrors facing bed is a no-no. So today, the wall mirrors have gone (now inside wardrobe door) and I’m getting rid of stuff…throwing out the old and superfluous. The background fug of depression has gone. I don’t know what it’s like to get divorced …but I have a funny feeling that if you are the divorce-er and have decided to walk out, the initial feeling of trepidation at what you’ve done may be followed by a feeling of freedom and opportunity – a feeling that you can turn the page and start something new….and something better.